so, what's your favorite sign?

Well, i'd have to say the question mark.

This is the most amazing sign, prompting people to start thinking for themselves, and in a manner not commanding but asking!  wonderful.

I vote we shall honor this sign seriously, often in everyday life we don't really consider the question mark, as dazed and bedazzled by everyday life and too little sleep we are not in fact able to do this.

what is really important?

I was bothered by not feeling equally important, smart and influential as certain other very young people.  Jealousy hit me.

I probably need to grow as a person.

Then i saw von Triers Melancholia yesterday - SPLENDID FILM!
Luckily i remembered this now, remembering the content of this film just rendered the above noted quarrel within myself and discontent with the human behavior and my own, senseless.
There are for sure more vital things to value in life!

(or is it?  critic in side me thinks of building societies and good arenas for people, after all it is usually necessary to consider all persons involved to make the most bulletproof state of common happyness.)

Anyways, I highly reccomend melancholia (and see it in a theater!)

constructed realities and trash talk.

I've been out all day with a friend trash talking our society, our system of higher education, some prominent educators and a couple of important people as well as a little bit some friends and ex'es.

Why can't we stop talking trash?
Do we really feel that sorry for ourselves that we need to justify our presumed injustice by shitting all over the place?

Does it help?  - NO
Does it hurt? - probably not.

With this particular friend we always discuss this matters.  What kind of odd habit is this?  Is it breakable?

I don't want to feel sorry for my own life - I don't win all battles, but it still ain't half bad.  I don't think talking shitty nonsense of other people helps the least.  Why is it so hard to talk real nonsense with no root in reality whatsoever?  I'd like all conversations to be more surreal, when we talk about "real" things we really mostly seem to construct some kind of phantasy world, and we find real facts in our lives to present as good arguments that this phantasy is real.  Then we start believing it only because we want it to be true, and it's convenient as we'we not yet developed any other "realities" that can pass as such a good a truth as this one.  It'll be the truth until some other truth is constructed and renders it meaningless.

So we create the web of lies.  I'd really like to try some other web, a web of pure phantasy - to se whether or not it's any worse than the odd lies of everyday conversations.

I probably need to live more and write less....

nonsense is a premise for sense?

  I am convinced there is something to say.  How to say it is hard to find.  What the content should be is impossible to presume.

oh lucky destiny. SCORN!

just as i was seriously in danger of becoming/being an obnoxious arrogant kind of human that no one but obnoxious and arrogant people can endure, i got a serious kick-back.  My face squished in the gravel, the ants licking it as i'm dragged towards the sour. In other words NOT FUN AT ALL.  But can i use this?

I decsend the throne, what now?

I've recently discovered that i will never be king of the world anyway.  Some time ago i thought it possible, certainly in the realm of my reality - but it was there.

What i'm wondering now is how to deal with my life now as i no longer have this overall goal for all my actions?

What should i aim for? how can i stay content?  I'm a megalomaniac who's gagged himself.  BUT I NEED TO BREATHE!

lobotomy seems the obvious answer to me.  Redirect my mentality and i will find another way.

unfortunately it's illegal, and also, i don't want any lobotomies, i want to be king of the world.  Damned.  I'll stay miserable forever trying to achieve the unachievable - and i'll probably be disgustingly happy like that... 

blogworld readers - where do they come from? and why?

i was checking out the statistics over who clicks in to my blog.  It's people from germany and USA, and as my posts doesn't emerge from any of those places i started wondering why those countries?
English is a good reason for the american crowd, but the german?  why not the Belgiques? or the Romanies? or italian? or Swedes?  or - i can certainly list the whole of europe.
But WHY NONE AFRICANS OR SOUTH AMERICANS?

parkour

parkour is kick-ass!  I tried today, first time, not for real just tried looking differently on surroundings in my city,  started climbing and jumping everywhere!

Faboulus.  Why don't we move more fun in real life?  I have the impression we have to behave to keep people not being scared of you.  If you behave differently - even just by being a bit physical - people might scrutinize you for insanities.

I'm very sane.  But I seriously vote for more creative moving in real life!!! not just in videos and exercises!

fly away!